Cleanup tracking on group.load

Cleanup tracking on group.load

1) deprecate force parameter
2) ditch the static & let the db lookups speak for themselves

The force paramter seems to mostly be about the static & probably only exists to support tests.
The static doesn't make sense now because either they group needs loading or it doesn't.
The fact the process might have tried and succeeded or failed before doesn't need
to be recorded in the static

Cleanup up progress tracking in Group::load

Fix test to do things in a logical order so contacts exist when the group is created